Dear August,
So, this year's letters haven't been as frequent as last year's. I'm sorry for that.
My laptop is currently being poked, prodded, and (hopefully) fixed in some warehouse somewhere (I like to think the North Pole, but that's just because I'm still five years old). So, it should be back to me once the end of these letters roll around. That means more substance to these letters than I can manage in just the hour I get for my lunch break when I sneak up to the Media Center in the library to use the computers there.
My life is kind of funny, August. There are so many random/odd/crazy/flabbergasting things that tend to happen to me. Like, gravity's constant need to be my enemy or Europe's need to prevent me from using all of my electronics. And there are so many other maybe not so funny things that have been a part of my life, but that's life, right?
At the beginning of my life, the Lord tried me with trials of faith having to do with my health (I was a sickly child), then my family (my parents' divorce), and once I got through all of those things, he's continued to try me with things that may not seem like much after those early trials to some, but to me, they are everything and they run deep. I won't get into too many details because trials are sacred things that should only be shared if we feel prompted to do so (not the case right now), but it's so interesting how much we grow.
That's so obvious, Jazmin. (What you were thinking.)
But it's not as obvious as when you consciously look back and see how life has shaped you.
When I was little, I would tell my dad that I wasn't moving away from him until I was 21 (or was it 25?). Well, I'm 21 now and I've lived on the other side of the country from him and my childhood home for three years (going on four now). I wanted to be a singer as a profession back then and now I want to be as far away from the spotlight as possible at a little desk editing books (maybe magazines). I spent my afternoons belting out Christina Aguilera/Beyonce/Kelly Clarkson songs into my karaoke machine's microphone until I blew said microphone (the most devastating day of my life). And while I still enjoy sappy love ballads, I've moved on to more folky ones and dance tunes (when I need a break from the banjo and broken hearts). And I rarely sing in front of others. If ever.
Those things are just minuscule parts of growing up, I know. But they are an important part of who I've become. Life has shaped me and I'd like to think it's for the better. The Lord has seen me through everyday and has tried to help when I've allowed him to. And it's always better when I do.
When I think about some of the funny/crazy things that have happened to me and happen to me on a regular basis, I like to think all of those things are placed in my life by the Lord to see me through when those not so funny/crazy things happen. He wants me to know He gave me this world to find happiness, not sorrow. He wants to see me smile, and He wants me to choose to smile, even when ridiculous things might happen. He tries me a lot, and I'm actually pretty grateful for that. I'm also grateful for the choice to laugh at the crazy, rather than dwell on any anger or frustration that might come with it.
So, this year's letters haven't been as frequent as last year's. I'm sorry for that.
My laptop is currently being poked, prodded, and (hopefully) fixed in some warehouse somewhere (I like to think the North Pole, but that's just because I'm still five years old). So, it should be back to me once the end of these letters roll around. That means more substance to these letters than I can manage in just the hour I get for my lunch break when I sneak up to the Media Center in the library to use the computers there.
My life is kind of funny, August. There are so many random/odd/crazy/flabbergasting things that tend to happen to me. Like, gravity's constant need to be my enemy or Europe's need to prevent me from using all of my electronics. And there are so many other maybe not so funny things that have been a part of my life, but that's life, right?
At the beginning of my life, the Lord tried me with trials of faith having to do with my health (I was a sickly child), then my family (my parents' divorce), and once I got through all of those things, he's continued to try me with things that may not seem like much after those early trials to some, but to me, they are everything and they run deep. I won't get into too many details because trials are sacred things that should only be shared if we feel prompted to do so (not the case right now), but it's so interesting how much we grow.
That's so obvious, Jazmin. (What you were thinking.)
But it's not as obvious as when you consciously look back and see how life has shaped you.
When I was little, I would tell my dad that I wasn't moving away from him until I was 21 (or was it 25?). Well, I'm 21 now and I've lived on the other side of the country from him and my childhood home for three years (going on four now). I wanted to be a singer as a profession back then and now I want to be as far away from the spotlight as possible at a little desk editing books (maybe magazines). I spent my afternoons belting out Christina Aguilera/Beyonce/Kelly Clarkson songs into my karaoke machine's microphone until I blew said microphone (the most devastating day of my life). And while I still enjoy sappy love ballads, I've moved on to more folky ones and dance tunes (when I need a break from the banjo and broken hearts). And I rarely sing in front of others. If ever.
Those things are just minuscule parts of growing up, I know. But they are an important part of who I've become. Life has shaped me and I'd like to think it's for the better. The Lord has seen me through everyday and has tried to help when I've allowed him to. And it's always better when I do.
When I think about some of the funny/crazy things that have happened to me and happen to me on a regular basis, I like to think all of those things are placed in my life by the Lord to see me through when those not so funny/crazy things happen. He wants me to know He gave me this world to find happiness, not sorrow. He wants to see me smile, and He wants me to choose to smile, even when ridiculous things might happen. He tries me a lot, and I'm actually pretty grateful for that. I'm also grateful for the choice to laugh at the crazy, rather than dwell on any anger or frustration that might come with it.
"I just really enjoy watching your life. You handle it so well." - a study abroad friend after I managed to hit and then miraculously catch my glass at a restaurant before it did too much damage.
At least my reflexes are getting better with each thing I tend to knock over (figuratively and literally).
But I'm still not confident enough to wear too much white without worry about spilling something.
Until another day,
Jazmin
