I apologize for the lack of postings since summer semester decided to end. My classes this semester are insane and I've also started working. Any free time I have is usually spent with these fools.
Fools
Friday, August 10, 2012
It was not until today, after I took my last final, that I hit that point where I realized I am a full-fledged adult. This whole time, I've kind of been feeling like this is just some freakishly long summer camp. On one hand, I'm really upset that I can't be home right now, but on the other I'm really glad and grateful for all the experiences I had this summer. I have met some incredible people and it has been a dream come true (dramatic?) to be around people who share my exact same values and beliefs. I no longer have to suppress my biblical jokes, or when someone says a line from a hymn in regular conversation, I am no longer the only one who gets that hymn stuck in their head immediately afterwards. More than just those values being matched in everyone I meet, I have met people that I have no trouble being my full self around, which is just incredible. Don't mistake me as putting on some facade. I just mean, with every friend we have, we magnify some specific personality trait around specific people, but I think I have held nothing back with every wonderful person I have had the privilege of meeting. I am so excited for what Fall has to offer.
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Saturday, August 4, 2012
College really has been everything and more everyone has pumped it up to be. It has been an incredible experience. Throughout my time here at BYU, the Lord has extended so many tender mercies through my more difficult times and has blessed me with such wonderful moments that I vow never to forget. I know it is just Summer term, and there will be even more difficult and joyous times come Fall, but it has been a better Summer than it probably would have been had I stayed at home watching Doctor Who and Disney movies for three months. Sure, I miss my bed, my dog, my mommy, and maybe even the humidity, but I'm so grateful for the shocking surprise of being accepted to this amazing school for Summer instead of Fall as was planned.
It seems every time I get a little homesick, the tender mercies of the Lord fall into my hands before I pluck up the courage to buy a plane ticket I cannot afford and rush back home to my mommy's arms. Yesterday was one of those days.
I was coming home from the dollar movie theater with Amelia, Isabel, and Mariangel. We took a creepy shortcut and came out of the brush out into a sidewalk near the open road across from their apartment complex. There was a girl on the sidewalk. I didn't really pay attention to her because it's rude to stare, but I shouted something to Amelia who was being crazy, and I think the girl thought I was talking to her. We made eye contact and she said, "Jazmin?!" It was my childhood friend, Celeste. We grew up in the same ward until we were about twelve and she moved. I've only seen her three times since that move, and of all places to see her, it was such an awesome occurrence. Even though she has not been a part of home for a long time, it was still a strangely comforting reminder of the home that I was starting to miss. As I walked and talked with her for a bit, I was kind of super comforted.
My Heavenly Father is incredible.
It seems every time I get a little homesick, the tender mercies of the Lord fall into my hands before I pluck up the courage to buy a plane ticket I cannot afford and rush back home to my mommy's arms. Yesterday was one of those days.
I was coming home from the dollar movie theater with Amelia, Isabel, and Mariangel. We took a creepy shortcut and came out of the brush out into a sidewalk near the open road across from their apartment complex. There was a girl on the sidewalk. I didn't really pay attention to her because it's rude to stare, but I shouted something to Amelia who was being crazy, and I think the girl thought I was talking to her. We made eye contact and she said, "Jazmin?!" It was my childhood friend, Celeste. We grew up in the same ward until we were about twelve and she moved. I've only seen her three times since that move, and of all places to see her, it was such an awesome occurrence. Even though she has not been a part of home for a long time, it was still a strangely comforting reminder of the home that I was starting to miss. As I walked and talked with her for a bit, I was kind of super comforted.
My Heavenly Father is incredible.
Monday, July 30, 2012
I just have to post about this right quick.
We had Ward Home Evening tonight, rather than Family Home Evening. The activity was Capture the Flag. It started with little unity and participation. After about half an hour of organizing and starting to play, two guys on my opposing team were going for the jail in which their friend was in to rescue him. These two boys collided and, right in front of me, one of them somehow broke his toe. Like, bone-popping-out toe-point-at-a-180-degree-line-vertically broke. It was gruesome.
Damage control was taken immediately. About five people rushed to the nearest campus emergency call box and phoned the campus police. While being put on hold (??) and waiting for the police to get there, the ward united. The guys gave the injured guy a blessing and we all joined in support of worry and prayer for our brother. After he was taken away by the police and then the paramedics, we all knelt in the middle of campus and said a ward prayer together.
It was an incredible experience brought about by something as seemingly small as a broken toe. It was incredible. The Spirit was felt by such a small event that we all shared together. We all united as sons and daughters of God and brothers and sisters in Christ.
(I'll post a picture of this gore later.)
We had Ward Home Evening tonight, rather than Family Home Evening. The activity was Capture the Flag. It started with little unity and participation. After about half an hour of organizing and starting to play, two guys on my opposing team were going for the jail in which their friend was in to rescue him. These two boys collided and, right in front of me, one of them somehow broke his toe. Like, bone-popping-out toe-point-at-a-180-degree-line-vertically broke. It was gruesome.
Damage control was taken immediately. About five people rushed to the nearest campus emergency call box and phoned the campus police. While being put on hold (??) and waiting for the police to get there, the ward united. The guys gave the injured guy a blessing and we all joined in support of worry and prayer for our brother. After he was taken away by the police and then the paramedics, we all knelt in the middle of campus and said a ward prayer together.
It was an incredible experience brought about by something as seemingly small as a broken toe. It was incredible. The Spirit was felt by such a small event that we all shared together. We all united as sons and daughters of God and brothers and sisters in Christ.
(I'll post a picture of this gore later.)
Things
Things I miss about Florida:
1) My mommy
2) My family
3) My dog
4) My high school and church friends
6) Chamblin's Bookmine (!!!!!)
5) The beach (I never thought I'd say that.)
6) Streets that do not have streaks of tar that my shoe slips on and my heels get caught in
7) The warm rain
8) The Scottish Highland Games
9) The Sarasota Medieval Faire
Things I'm loving about Utah:
1) The way the sun sets over the mountains outside my window
2) The mountains themselves
3) The lack of humidity
4) The fact that everyone here is friendly
5) The history
6) The amazing friends I have made
7) The deeper doctrine that I've been learning in my classes
8) The fact that prayers are said before my classes :DDD
9) The vast amount of things there are to do (if only I had a car!)
10) The fact that my little Mormon quirks are acceptable and mutual here (not just the standards I uphold, but things such as bursting into song and dance, Mormon jokes, etc.)
1) My mommy
2) My family
3) My dog
4) My high school and church friends
6) Chamblin's Bookmine (!!!!!)
5) The beach (I never thought I'd say that.)
6) Streets that do not have streaks of tar that my shoe slips on and my heels get caught in
7) The warm rain
8) The Scottish Highland Games
9) The Sarasota Medieval Faire
Things I'm loving about Utah:
1) The way the sun sets over the mountains outside my window
2) The mountains themselves
3) The lack of humidity
4) The fact that everyone here is friendly
5) The history
6) The amazing friends I have made
7) The deeper doctrine that I've been learning in my classes
8) The fact that prayers are said before my classes :DDD
9) The vast amount of things there are to do (if only I had a car!)
10) The fact that my little Mormon quirks are acceptable and mutual here (not just the standards I uphold, but things such as bursting into song and dance, Mormon jokes, etc.)
Sunday, July 22, 2012
It's an interesting concept to think of faith. Some people describe our belief system as our "faith" and those within our belief system say we must "have faith" in Christ and Heavenly Father to progress and grow in this life.
The rough edges of life have been poking their way through to my thoughts and heart these past few days. A combination of missing home and being upset about things there and here that I have no control over have weighed themselves on my spirit. I realize a blog is where most people put the greatest parts of their lives front-and-center for the world to admire and desire to emulate, but I'm going to make you a little uncomfortable for this one.
I won't get into the dirty details, but it's been one of those small and significant trials of my faith. I really just wanted to crawl into my bed and cry, but I've found that the sooner I place my trials in my Heavenly Father and my Savior's hands, the sooner I gain the strength I need and the understanding that the trial can be endured. As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, it's one of those concepts that we are constantly hearing. You pray with faith, you can endure. You trust in the Lord's power, His healing hands become evident in your trials. While it may be repetitive in nature, it doesn't make it any less true. It was said in a General Conference awhile ago that the fact that these teachings are so often repeated should be a testament to us of their supernal significance.
I felt like each talk and lesson given today was specifically for my hurting heart. It was as if my Father in Heaven was there Himself, counseling me on how to get through this, telling me He's on my side. Through these trials, I let my faith slip for a moment. I let the world fog my view of the Person who is really governing it all. I allowed myself to crumble under the weight of man's worries.
In one talk today, someone said something to the effect that trials should not be seen as burdens, but opportunities. In this view, we see that the opportunity is to grow and progress; the opportunity is to draw closer to our Heavenly Father and our Savior who took upon Himself all the pains of the world that we may have someone who understands fully what we go through and can thus forgive us and make up for where we lack.
There is no love like the love of my Savior and my Heavenly Father. I can't even begin to repay Them for what They have done for me every day of my existence in this life, in the premortal existence, and what They will continue to do for me for time and all eternity. Their tender mercies shine through in all that I go through, the good and the bad.
The rough edges of life have been poking their way through to my thoughts and heart these past few days. A combination of missing home and being upset about things there and here that I have no control over have weighed themselves on my spirit. I realize a blog is where most people put the greatest parts of their lives front-and-center for the world to admire and desire to emulate, but I'm going to make you a little uncomfortable for this one.
I won't get into the dirty details, but it's been one of those small and significant trials of my faith. I really just wanted to crawl into my bed and cry, but I've found that the sooner I place my trials in my Heavenly Father and my Savior's hands, the sooner I gain the strength I need and the understanding that the trial can be endured. As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, it's one of those concepts that we are constantly hearing. You pray with faith, you can endure. You trust in the Lord's power, His healing hands become evident in your trials. While it may be repetitive in nature, it doesn't make it any less true. It was said in a General Conference awhile ago that the fact that these teachings are so often repeated should be a testament to us of their supernal significance.
I felt like each talk and lesson given today was specifically for my hurting heart. It was as if my Father in Heaven was there Himself, counseling me on how to get through this, telling me He's on my side. Through these trials, I let my faith slip for a moment. I let the world fog my view of the Person who is really governing it all. I allowed myself to crumble under the weight of man's worries.
In one talk today, someone said something to the effect that trials should not be seen as burdens, but opportunities. In this view, we see that the opportunity is to grow and progress; the opportunity is to draw closer to our Heavenly Father and our Savior who took upon Himself all the pains of the world that we may have someone who understands fully what we go through and can thus forgive us and make up for where we lack.
There is no love like the love of my Savior and my Heavenly Father. I can't even begin to repay Them for what They have done for me every day of my existence in this life, in the premortal existence, and what They will continue to do for me for time and all eternity. Their tender mercies shine through in all that I go through, the good and the bad.
When I was visiting Southern Virginia University, my mom, grandma, and I decided to take a trip to Colonial Williamsburg because I'm a bit of a U.S. history nerd. When we were on one of the buses to get to some location I can't remember, I sat next to this man. He was really nice and we had a pretty good conversation. I told him I was there visiting SVU. I don't remember him knowing it was an LDS-based school. He asked me where else I was planning on applying, and I told him what I told everyone -- BYU, UF, and UNF. Upon hearing BYU, he of course asked if I was LDS. I said yes. An awkward silence followed. We arrived at our destination. We said our goodbyes, and with confidence he declared that I would "definitely be choosing to go to BYU.". I remember being so offended by this. I quickly informed him that SVU also had LDS-centered values, and he sarcastically said, "Ohhh okay." As if that was my only criteria for this massive decision. It irked to the bone for some reason. Looking back now, I realize how offended the Lord must have been. He had presented me with the opportunity to say, "Yep, I'm LDS and it's what defines me." But instead I let the notion seep into my brainwaves that my religion isn't what defines me and it's not what's going to define my future. How dare I! I hope people see and understand that my religion is what defines me. It is who I am, what I stand for, and what I will live for through all my days in this life and the next. I hope people know that I know I have a Savior and a Heavenly Father that know me perfectly and love me more than I will ever deserve.
Our experiences in this life, moments of joy and trial alike, are presented to us for our benefit. They are opportunities. They are blessed chances for us to take another step on the road to our complete and divine potential. Trials are "but a small moment" and if we seek the help of our loving Father and the healing power of our Savior's Atonement we can and will "triumph over all our foes." We can and will be granted divine strength and power to endure if we just trust with faith that Heavenly Father is there and so ready and willing to help.
Maybe this post was confusing, but just know you are loved far more than you can imagine by a Heavenly Father who is the Father of our Spirits. He sent His son, Jesus Christ to atone for our sins and grant us the opportunity of forgiveness and a way back to our real home, in Heaven with Them. They know each of us individually, and with incredibly powerful love They want to help. They want to help so very much.
Thursday, July 19, 2012
So, I just successfully cleaned my room thoroughly for cleaning checks tonight. Not only did I successfully complete this task five hours earlier than I expected, I also only locked myself out of my room once. In my world, that's a sign of a good day.*
I know I said I'd write about the rest of my awesome-tastic weekend yesterday, but I need to get some work done before that infinity long post. As a little taste of my BYU experience as of late, though, I guess I could tell you about my yesterday evening.
I was putting off doing homework like no other and I was feeling a tad bummed about certain things that will remain between my journal and me...and probably my mom since I tend to tell her everything. I just planned on laying low and cuddling up to my book** and doing laundry that desperately needed to be done. On my way down to the basement*** laundry room, I ran into Carolyn (my fall roommate), Vicki (Carolyn's summer roommate), a few other girls from my floor, and my RA. Judging by the giggles, the copious amounts of blushing, and the consistent use of the pronoun "he", they were obviously talking some serious girl talk. I just passed by because judging by the bits and pieces of the conversation that I heard, it sounded like a level of boy crazy was going on that I don't really care to engage in.****
After stuffing my clothes in the drier and heading back to my room, the same group of gals were now sitting in the hallway looking like they were ready to embark on some adventure. One of these lovely gals, Micaela invited me to tag along. The adventure entailed Dairy Queen and oh, was I excited. I've only had ice cream once since being in Utah and I haven't had Dairy Queen-level ice cream since weeks before I left Florida.
We made the little walk to that beautiful haven and it was just what my sore day needed. Apparently, I wasn't the only one who was having a bad day, so it was nice to just let go of it all with other people having equally crappy days.
Our walk back included almost getting run over by a car that sped through a red light, and dancing like completely wonderful idiots to Micaela's ipod. It was exactly what I needed.
I ended up getting back and having to do another cycle of my clothes in the drier, but that allowed me studying time. I didn't get to bed until about 1AM, but it was so worth it.
*Not that I'm constantly locking myself out of my room, but with my luck, it probably should have happened at least two more times as I made my travels to the cleaning supplies closet.
**I finished The Princess Bride! Well, I actually finished it just before my 1pm class, but I was reading the extra stuff at the end about Buttercup's Baby while performing my even procrastination ritual.
***It's still super weird for me to say the word basement. It's such a foreign concept to my Floridian mind. I still think of them as something mythical like Mordor or Narnia. Okay, maybe not Narnia. We all know that's real.
****Not that there's anything wrong with girls that are boy crazy. It's just never really been something I cared too much for. Since being at BYU, though, it seems that's how girls here bond. So, I've been somewhat more boy crazy than I like to admit, but on this particular night I was not feeling up to the energy required to giggle and scream about those who possess Y chromosomes.
I know I said I'd write about the rest of my awesome-tastic weekend yesterday, but I need to get some work done before that infinity long post. As a little taste of my BYU experience as of late, though, I guess I could tell you about my yesterday evening.
I was putting off doing homework like no other and I was feeling a tad bummed about certain things that will remain between my journal and me...and probably my mom since I tend to tell her everything. I just planned on laying low and cuddling up to my book** and doing laundry that desperately needed to be done. On my way down to the basement*** laundry room, I ran into Carolyn (my fall roommate), Vicki (Carolyn's summer roommate), a few other girls from my floor, and my RA. Judging by the giggles, the copious amounts of blushing, and the consistent use of the pronoun "he", they were obviously talking some serious girl talk. I just passed by because judging by the bits and pieces of the conversation that I heard, it sounded like a level of boy crazy was going on that I don't really care to engage in.****
After stuffing my clothes in the drier and heading back to my room, the same group of gals were now sitting in the hallway looking like they were ready to embark on some adventure. One of these lovely gals, Micaela invited me to tag along. The adventure entailed Dairy Queen and oh, was I excited. I've only had ice cream once since being in Utah and I haven't had Dairy Queen-level ice cream since weeks before I left Florida.
We made the little walk to that beautiful haven and it was just what my sore day needed. Apparently, I wasn't the only one who was having a bad day, so it was nice to just let go of it all with other people having equally crappy days.
I don't understand why it is physically impossible for me to take a normal picture.
Our walk back included almost getting run over by a car that sped through a red light, and dancing like completely wonderful idiots to Micaela's ipod. It was exactly what I needed.
I ended up getting back and having to do another cycle of my clothes in the drier, but that allowed me studying time. I didn't get to bed until about 1AM, but it was so worth it.
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*Not that I'm constantly locking myself out of my room, but with my luck, it probably should have happened at least two more times as I made my travels to the cleaning supplies closet.
**I finished The Princess Bride! Well, I actually finished it just before my 1pm class, but I was reading the extra stuff at the end about Buttercup's Baby while performing my even procrastination ritual.
***It's still super weird for me to say the word basement. It's such a foreign concept to my Floridian mind. I still think of them as something mythical like Mordor or Narnia. Okay, maybe not Narnia. We all know that's real.
****Not that there's anything wrong with girls that are boy crazy. It's just never really been something I cared too much for. Since being at BYU, though, it seems that's how girls here bond. So, I've been somewhat more boy crazy than I like to admit, but on this particular night I was not feeling up to the energy required to giggle and scream about those who possess Y chromosomes.
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