Dear August,
I kind of thrive on nostalgia.
That's why I do things like these letters; that's why I tried taking pictures of every view I had from all the hostels/hotels I stayed at in Europe (and why my camera's memory card never seems to have enough room); that's why my journal bulges with useless knick knacks like train tickets, pictures by friends drawn on menus, and a rock I found on some adventure.
Maybe that's why I love reading so much. Maybe I love reveling in other people's nostalgia (real or not) just as much as I do my own. I think of their moments even when I'm not reading about them for days on end, and I do the same with my own moments I've been given.
The good thing about this little quirk of mine is the fact that I can remember moments so readily and can pull them out of my mind with complete vividness years after they happened (I can't say the same thing about basic algebra, unfortunately). The bad thing about this is the fact that I sometimes forget to have the moment because I spend all of my time trying to make sure its captured in one way or another (pictures, thinking up a journal entry or blog post). It's something I've been working on for the past little while, especially because actual adulthood is approaching fast and I'm finding it hard not to waste my time capturing those moments as much as possible.
I applied for graduation the other day and it's all too surreal. I feel like I've been carrying this fake ID around for the past three years that says I'm an adult, when in reality, I've just been faking it. The next year to come is calling me out on it and asking for an actual adult ID that says what I'm going to do with my life and how I'm going to make it happen. I'm still working on those details (sorry, mom), and I'm feeling the weight of what those details mean.
I'd like to say/think I still have plenty of time to figure it all out, but the almost four years I've had to figure all that out is quickly turning into months that I don't know what to do with.
Pray for me, August. I'm gonna need it.
Sincerely,
Jazmin
I kind of thrive on nostalgia.
That's why I do things like these letters; that's why I tried taking pictures of every view I had from all the hostels/hotels I stayed at in Europe (and why my camera's memory card never seems to have enough room); that's why my journal bulges with useless knick knacks like train tickets, pictures by friends drawn on menus, and a rock I found on some adventure.
 |
| View from our hostel in Ambleside |
 |
| View from our hostel in Dublin (featuring the coolest window ever) |
 |
| View from our hotel room in Shannon |
The good thing about this little quirk of mine is the fact that I can remember moments so readily and can pull them out of my mind with complete vividness years after they happened (I can't say the same thing about basic algebra, unfortunately). The bad thing about this is the fact that I sometimes forget to have the moment because I spend all of my time trying to make sure its captured in one way or another (pictures, thinking up a journal entry or blog post). It's something I've been working on for the past little while, especially because actual adulthood is approaching fast and I'm finding it hard not to waste my time capturing those moments as much as possible.
I applied for graduation the other day and it's all too surreal. I feel like I've been carrying this fake ID around for the past three years that says I'm an adult, when in reality, I've just been faking it. The next year to come is calling me out on it and asking for an actual adult ID that says what I'm going to do with my life and how I'm going to make it happen. I'm still working on those details (sorry, mom), and I'm feeling the weight of what those details mean.
I'd like to say/think I still have plenty of time to figure it all out, but the almost four years I've had to figure all that out is quickly turning into months that I don't know what to do with.
Pray for me, August. I'm gonna need it.
Sincerely,
Jazmin
No comments:
Post a Comment